I am NOT mental

Toni Collette as Shaz in Mental

Giles Hardie (with P.J. Hogan), The Sydney Morning Herald, reports

Meet the most Mental Australian, Shaz, a goddess of "mind blowin truths" answered your questions (with the help of the film's writer/director PJ Hogan).

Shaz was here and live!

The disgruntled, embittered and arguably mental character upon whom PJ Hogan's new film Mental is based, answered your questions for an hour in the comments section of the Sydney Morning Herald article.

But now, it's farewell Shaz.

"Australia, I bid you so long, farewell, aufedersein, good night." SHAZ.

The answers are still here for your enjoyment.

WARNING: Shaz is not a medical health professional, though she is willing to help identify what is mental.

Take a browse of Shaz's twitter profile @shazismental and it quickly becomes apparent that Shaz believes:

·         Perth is a fictional city

·         Justin Bieber is a ventriloquist's dummy

·         George Clooney should play Ted in the movie version of Play School

Is there anything that you won’t discuss with our readers? (why/why not?)

Me life’s an open book since that PJ Hogan hack made this film about me.

However there is sum things I think should remain private like me sexual preferences. For all me loyal lezzie fans out there, sadly me lezzie days are behind me (unless that’s you textin me little Dannii Minogue).

I also don’t wish to discuss me torrid affair with Kevin Rudd, or that regrettable drunken nite with Tony Abbott when I made Tony wear a bag over his head. Also that rash cougar-moment with young Sam Clark on the set of Mental should probably go unmentioned. And I definitely don’t want to talk about that nasty yeast infection I had last month. Apart from them secrets fire away readers.

How would you summarize your life philosophy?

I am a sagacious, all-knowing muse, yet humble and approachable. I am committed to collecting rare and unusual bongs, the care of me dog Ripper and JUSTICE. I am often called upon by world leaders and deep thinkers for me sage advice – for example the Dalai Lama just doesn’t get why he has 12 million followers on Twitter yet known slag and waste-of-space Kim Kardashian has over 15 million. Personally I don’t get why the Dalai Llama is ON Twitter in the first place – shouldn’t he be out Llama-ing sumwhere?

Kevin Rudd doesn’t get why I won’t return his calls (one word, Kev: stalker). I maintain sum mysteries should remain unsolved like why does anyone watch Big Brother in the first place.

Are you mental? (and what does that mean?)

I am not mental.

The title of the film refers to the state of mind of the director when he was makin it. And that Toni Collette’s a total nut job too, but I can’t say that in public cause she’s also litigious.

I wanted to call it Goddess of Mind Blowin Truths but they couldn’t fit it on the poster.

Look, I don’t think there’s no such thing as ‘normal,’ not in this country – I mean, Prime Minister Harold Holt drowns and they name an Aquatic Centre after him, they charge ya for the Internet which should be free cause when was the last time ya ever saw CYBERSPACE on sale by the yard at Spotlight, and will sumone pleeze explain to me the whole concept of Guy Sebastion cause I don’t get it.